CLEMENS: Any place that doesn't stock a good cigar doesn't rank high in my book.
TROI: If you must have one, I'm sure we could replicate it for you.
CLEMENS (pained): You think one of those—imitations—could take the place of a hand-wrapped Havana?
TROI (mildly): I wouldn't know...
CLEMENS: That's the problem I see here... all this technology... it only serves to take away life's simple pleasures. You don't even let a man open a door for a lady.
TROI: I think what we've gained outweighs anything that might have been lost..."Time's Arrow, Part II, Episode 601"
It wasn't the fact that Star Trek: The Next Generation took place in an unlikely future where mankind had erected a sterile, boring utopia that made the show insufferable; rather, it was the writers' use of that politically correct paradise to establish a moral superiority over lesser-evolved cultures and races. The show wields its utopia like a blunt instrument to silence dissent among unruly characters and wayward viewers. The above exchange between that nighttime fantasy of every thirteen-year-old boy, Counselor Deanna Troi, and one Samuel "Mark Twain" Clemens illustrates this point to near perfection, although one must hear actress Marina Sirtis' reading of the last line to fully appreciate the level of smugness.
Despite this little disagreement, ST:TNG is quick to adopt Clemens as its own by making him fret over the way humanity had acted in his day and hopeful that we have evolved in the 24th century. Not to worry, Mr. Twain; mankind has indeed evolved into a sort of "personkind," where the differences between genders are nothing more than distribution of body mass and a dubious second-season beard on the Enterprise's first mate.
DATA: (I have an) understanding the Prime Directive, sir.
PICARD: Which is, unfortunately, what this is about. By our standards, the customs here and code of honor are the same kind of pompous, strutting charades that endangered our own species a few centuries ago. We evolved out of it because no one else imposed their own... (stops; shakes head ruefully) Sorry, that became a speech.
TROI: You're the captain, sir. You're entitled..."Code Of Honor" Ep 104
Apparently, as Troi aptly demonstrates, 24th century humankind hasn't quite evolved beyond ass-kissing. So, one might ask, in what kind of paradise do Captain Picard and his intrepid crew reside? Surely, it must be a magnificent place to be far superior to virtually every other society in the known universe.
The references to this utopia are scattered throughout the series and at times read like a wish-list for leftist ideologues. The Trek Utopia is godless:
RIKER: We have a problem.
PICARD: The contamination?
RIKER: It's worse than we suspected. The Mintakans are beginning to believe in a god—
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PICARD: Your own reports describe how rational these people are. Millennia ago, they abandoned all belief in the supernatural. And now you're asking me to sabotage that achievement... send them back into the Dark Ages of fear and superstition."Who Watches the Watchers", Ep 304
The Trek Utopia is, of course, Pro-Choice, though hidden slightly by the choice itself in this instance:
TROI: Captain, do whatever you feel is necessary to protect the ship and the crew... but know this. I am going to have this baby.
(Everyone reacts, then:)
PICARD: I believe that ends the discussion."The Child" Ep 201
There is no Death Penalty:
LIATOR: Do you execute criminals?
PICARD: No... not any longer, that is.
RIVAN: You did once?
PICARD: ...Yes, some people then felt it was necessary. But we've learned how to detect the seeds of criminal behavior... Capital punishment is no longer justified in our world as a deterrent."Justice" Ep 108
Meat no longer comes from cows and pigs:
RIKER: ...Lieutenant Yar was... confused. We no longer enslave animals for food purposes.
BADAR N'D'D: But we have seen humans eat meat!
(The Antican grins -- a terrifying display of long, sharp fangs.)
RIKER: You've seen something as fresh and tasty as living meat, but inorganically materialized out of patterns used by our transporters."Lonely Among Us" Ep 107
There's not even any bad weather in Utopia:
DATA: (Cont'd) Their home was destroyed during a tornado.
PICARD: A tornado? Why wasn't it dissipated by the Weather Modification Net?"True Q", Ep 606
Don't doubt it! Trek Utopia is a truly wondrous place!
PICARD: (having traveled to the past) No. He's a man with vision. He can see beyond the problems that surround us. He knows there's a better future out there for everyone... a future where crime, poverty and war are things of the past... a future where we reach out and seek our destiny in the stars. (beat) I believe in that future, too, Ruby. I believe in it in every fiber of my being. And I'm telling you... if we don't launch that warp ship tomorrow, there's a very good chance that future will never happen.Star Trek: First Contact
And I think we can agree that Jean-Luc Picard had every right to that smug, condescending smirk that often graced his features throughout the seven-season run of ST:TNG. His culture, having eliminated god, disease, war, poverty, and bad weather, would be ready to face all challenges that lay ahead.
Except, of course, cancellation.
"I'd like to take this opportunity to ask every person listening in, whoever and wherever they may be, to pause for a moment and contemplate the events of the past few hours, and to give thanks in his or her own way."Buzz Aldrin, after landing on the moon
Snowdog is a systems analyst who lists writing among his less-expensive hobbies. Once a story is subdued and dragged from his labyrinthian mind, it is often left on the doorstep of the Snowdog's Den with a note that reads "Feed me!" He also enjoys performing fiction for unsuspecting passersby in Trenton, NJ.
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