The philosophy of ethics is a type of psychological warfare used by abstract thinkers who have no grip on reality and a strange inability to balance their checkbooks. They use this surreal worldview to develop Möbius-like, self-contradicting statements about reality and truth. Statements like, "Reality does not exist," and, "There is no such thing as pain," and, "There is a hypothetical, perfect, objective, omniscient observer who could answer that question except that he doesn't exist and if he did, he wouldn't tell us."
The number one victim of this insidious warfare is the innocent, pure mind of the mild-mannered engineer who learned to debate in a thorough, logical manner. When exposed to the philosophy of ethics, the aforementioned engineer will find herself gazing at the far wall , slightly cross-eyed, rocking softly back and forth, humming Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit," while her brain turns into something that slightly resembles three-month old guacamole. Once their victim has reached the stage of catatonia, the philosophers will dance about gleefully, then meet at the local martini bar where they will over-indulge in absinthe and plot the destruction of all rational thought.
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