And the winner is...

My, my, I'd forgotten how much I enjoyed doing this. However, since Henry had already written up his comments before I stepped in and asserted authority, I'm mostly going to loot shamelessly from his work.

Henry writes: Torainfor wrote a full story for this challenge, with a nice intro to setup our main character and the interesting idea that Santa provides the military with hi-tech goodies to keep them from destroying his workshop again. There's a neat bit with the whole NORAD Santa track, something I remember watching as a young lad. The story acknowledges Rickover's accidental destruction of Santa's village and is a natural progression from that accident to the current day. The whole military attitude came off quite well and certainly seems authentic to someone who's been a civilian his whole life. The writing was light and breezy and struck just the right tone through out. Excellent work.

To which I'll add: I enjoyed this one a lot. I even laughed out-loud at the bit of scene-setting business on page four: "Don't believe what you've seen in Stargate or WarGames—Hollywood has a much bigger set budget than NORAD." Yup. Nailed that one spot-on. This was definitely the most complete and fully developed of the entries, although there were times I felt as if I was reading a rough draft, as some of the transitions were a bit confusing.

However, the assignment was to sketch out an awful made-for-TV movie based on the idea, and this one, good as it is, doesn't meet the requirement.

Next, Henry writes: Miko's entry is really interesting and seems likely to eventually get to the actual challenge. But he doesn't get there with this entry. I love the ideas and wonder just how much, if any, of the submarine jargon he's gotten right. I've got a friend who spent 20 years in the navy, most of that in boomers, who could tell me if I really needed to know. As much as I enjoyed reading the entry and as much as I'd love to read what comes next, I can't judge a fragment of the story. Good stuff, just not what we're looking for this week.

Again, I find myself agreeing with Henry's assessment. This is the beginning of a really engaging story, and I really want to know what comes next. But in the context of this particular challenge, it simply isn't what we are looking for.

Henry writes: Waterboy's entry—which he still probably doesn't believe is an entry—really does get the spirit of what we were looking for with this challenge. It's got schmaltz, a silly scheme to deliver toys, a great explanation for the NORAD Santa track and a Christmas romance between the admiral and an officer on his staff. As Waterboy says, real military people would be appalled at this whole thing. That probably means Hollywood is in the process of developing something similar to this right now! The only extra bit of silliness I could add to this would be if the XO [is a single mother] with a little boy who has some handicap that is healed by the magic of the Christmas Kiss. Either that, or have Rickover and the XO adopt an orphan who was being raised by the elves. For a toss-away idea, Waterboy really hit all the right notes!

Wow. Henry and I and congruent three-for-three. My only added comment is in the [square brackets], above.

Henry writes: Arisia gives us a new entry in the Christmas Cannon; the Wishing Ones. Not only do we have a Christmas quest to find craft-elves to replace those lost in the disaster, we get the quest for the Wishing Ones; a quest that will give the writers all the time they need to hit just the right Christmas schmaltz notes with scenes of the homeless and orphans and the joy Christmas brings to one and all. Finally, we get what every good Christmas special requires: product placement! And, as this special is shown on TV, Starbucks starts a new ad campaign: "The official coffee of Christmas!" Again, just the right notes are hit and I'm positive the Wishing Ones would soon be considered as much a part of Christmas as that reindeer with the glowing nose.

Nothing to add to this one, either.

Finally, Henry writes: The bandit has obviously been paying attention to Climategate, which makes me happy all by itself. I'm also extremely impressed at how much he's gotten from my little toss-away bit about Christmas coal and carbon credits. Honestly, I could see this story being written by a reporter from the AP. The failure to question the authority of the global warming alarmists is distressingly accurate. The ridiculous claims by said alarmists are right in line with what I'd expect were this a real story. From beginning to end, the entry is spot on. Unfortunately, it's spot onto a topic that only tangentially touches the actual challenge. Judged solely on its merits as a satire news article, I'd probably go with this entry to win, but we have to judge based on more than that. Great entry, regardless.

I am tempted. I am sorely tempted...

Henry writes: "In looking over the voting thus far, there were two votes for Waterboy, one for Arisia and one for the bandit. I admit to being torn. I love the bandit's entry but can't select it because it didn't really respond to the challenge. If Miko's story were complete, I could see selecting it as the winner. Arisia's is neat and I can see a whole line of Wishing One action figures (collect them all!) and homeless shelter play sets to go with them. Waterboy's almost-an-entry really hits the right notes—thus the two votes. Finally, torainfor's story is quite good and certainly the most complete entry that also stayed with the topic.

"In the end, I lean towards Waterboy for coming up with an idea that actually does make the Star Wars Christmas Special look downright artistic in comparison. But I think the bandit deserves special mention for the best parody I've seen in a long time."

And in a real breakthrough, I find myself not only agreeing with Henry five-for-five, but also with the results of the expressed votes. Torainfor wrote a great, self-contained story; Miko's entry has me wishing I could see what comes next and how these characters' stories develop. Arisia as usual introduces some interesting ideas that make me want to see what would result if she really turned her imagination loose, and the bandit's entry is very, very tempting.

But in the end, I have to pick Waterboy as this week's winner, because he did the best job of sticking to the assigned topic, which was to write a pitch for an awful made-for-TV Christmas movie, and the one he's sketched out certainly would be truly, wonderfully, shamelessly awful. The only thing missing is a song-and-dance number featuring a chorus line of CGI penguins. (Never mind that penguins live at the South Pole; this is for TV.) Ergo, Waterboy, come on down and claim your prize!

Honorable Mention goes to The Bandit—and something from the prize bin as well, because, well, what the heck: it's Christmas.