I think I may have to retire from UGF competition. Someone I work with was tasked with finding a way to obfuscate our Perl scripts and make them harder to read, and late yesterday afternoon he sent his manager the following email.
> Hey [name deleted]I can only hang my head in despair and yield to his superior geek fu. Indeed, I believe my friend has achieved nerdvana.
>
> I just found a great way we can obfuscate our perl scripts without having to convert them to c, compile them, or anything.
>
> Write them in Klingon!!!
>
> http://search.cpan.org/~mschwern/Lingua-tlhInganHol-yIghun-20090601/lib/Lingua/tlhInganHol/yIghun.pm
I'm turning the rest of this column over to Henry.
~brb
It's Blockbuster Movie Month
Wow, it's already the 5th day of Blockbuster Movie Month, the month formerly known as May. As usual, the movie studios have loaded up the month with all sorts of big-budget movies in the hopes of convincing us to part with our hard earned money to watch these masterpieces. So, what delights do the studios have lined up for us this year?
Just last night while watching the telly, in the space of half an hour, I saw ads for:
Iron Man 2 - Samuel L. Jackson as Nick Fury, Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.?!?! Oh, the humanity!
Robin Hood - It's Robin Hood! But it's starring Russell Crowe! But it's Robin Hood! But Russell Crowe looks like he's still trying to redo Gladiator. And it's not the traditional Robin Hood vs. the Sheriff of Nottingham story, either. Instead, Robin is a war-weary vet returning from the crusades only to have to defend his homeland from invaders. Hm, Robin Hood the staunch defender of England or Robin Hood the insurgent? Oh, I can't decide.
Prince of Persia - Another megabudget effects extravaganza based on a video game. Will this be another Super Mario Bros., Mortal Kombat, Wing Commander, Doom, or will it be -- well, I'm sure there must have been one good movie based on a video game. It's just slipping my mind at the moment. Give me a minute; I'll think of it.
MacGruber - On the other hand, I know that there has never been a good movie based on a Saturday Night Live sketch. Ever. Go ahead; name one. Okay, The Blues Brothers, that one was half-good, in the parts where Dan Ackroyd wasn't "acting" and John Belushi wasn't "singing." I'll give you that one. Now name another. I dare you.
Shrek 4 - The original was great. The sequel was good. The third movie got away from the fairy tale roots that made the first two movies work. With the fourth installment, Shrek enters into a battle of wits with Rumpelstiltskin. At least they're getting back to fairy tales.
Sex and the City 2 - I'll wait for Vox's review before making any plans to see this one.
Or maybe you'd rather wait for June's blockbusters: Marmaduke (pass), The A-Team (I pity the fool!), The Karate Kid (except he's actually learning Chinese kung-fu instead of karate), Jonah Hex (a lesser known DC Comics western title), Toy Story 3 (I predict this will be my favorite movie of the summer) and The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (uh, no).
Let the arguments begin!
ULTIMAGE GEEK FU runs every Wednesday. Have a question that's just bugging the heck out of you about Star Wars, Star Trek, Stargate, Battlestar Gallactica, Farscape, Firefly, Fringe, Heroes, The Sarah Connor Chronicles, Smallville, The X-Files, X-Men, The Man From Atlantis, or pretty much any other SF-flavored media property? Send it to slushpile@thefridaychallenge.com with the subject line, "Geek Fu," and we'll stuff it in the queue.
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